Thank you Googol
My pet cat Googol, passed away on 3rd August 2026. He was 10 years old. One of the constant sources of motivation, he filled my life with cheerful moments. I always wanted to write an article to share his journey and thank him for everything. Here it is.
All the pictures in this article were taken while he was sleeping (as he would not pose for a photo when awake), so do not misunderstand it for anything else.
Beginning
Many people easily get confused with his name. They think he is named after Google, the tech giant and search engine. But the truth is, I named him as Googol, which means one followed by hundred zeroes.
The reason is simple. His mother gave birth to a lot of kitties, but only Googol survived. So I named him as such to signify that he is the one after thousand zeroes. Yes, it is the opposite of what the number means, but I named him when I was a kid. So it is, what it is.
Tiny universe
Googol lived a very simple life. My parents always used to say, that either Googol is following my ways or I’m following his ways. Either way, his life consisted of two complex tasks of eating and sleeping. He would dedicate a lot of hours everyday for these meticulous tasks and always finish them in first quality. Sometimes, he would even forget what is happening around him and work so focused, such that I remember carrying him when he was sleeping and he did not even bother opening his eyes.
Unlike many cats I have heard of, Googol was not the type of cat who would sleep in your lap, come running for you when you open the door or rub himself in your legs. He is a professional. No cosmetics or innocent meows. If you are eating something, he would come and join you. Otherwise, he will go for sleep.
Sometimes, he would want something, but it may not be urgent. So he would just come and sit staring at me. Most of the times, it is for water. If not considered, he would simply leave for his outdoor adventure and come back later.
He lived a gentle life. No fights with other cats, always preferring the ways of peace. He never hunted a rat or lizard. His favorite food is coconut milk and coconut rice. He loved eating roasted carrots, spinach etc. He did not like omelettes, but boiled eggs were part of his daily intake. He would eat at least two boiled eggs a day.
The only cat behavior he inherited is desire for fish and milk.
He lived his own life. Not like playing with me or doing any mischievous behavior in home.
Foes and foes
May be, one reason for his non-violence preference is the bully cats he had to escape since his childhood. When he was young, there used to a bully street cat who would always chase him. Fearing for the bully, he would sleep behind TVs, on top of shelves etc. But as they say, time heals everything and the bully cat passed away. So Googol was the only male cat left in my street and it was his rule. But even then, he did not abuse his privilege. He simply expanded his sleeping perimeters to other house terraces etc.
The next bully cat appeared out of nowhere two years ago. He was so violent with Googol that he would enter our house during nights and try to bite him. This was such a nightmare for all of us. Because, first is the rage over how audacious can a bully cat be to attack Googol in his own home. Second, Googol never fought back, he only tried to run away. So he earned our sympathy. Even our neighbors pitied him and shooed the bully cat away whenever they found him.
Googol also faced a lot of problems during this period, which I will cover in a later section. Thankfully, the bully cat somehow met his fate and Googol was at peace at last.
Significance
Googol’s pictures were my social media profile pictures. From WhatsApp to Telegram to GitHub to everything. As a result, everyone who communicated with me got familiar with Googol. There was even a time where searching for my name Arun Mani J would result in pictures of Googol from my Stack Exchange and GitHub accounts. I had friends who would ask me about Googol whenever we met.
Googol had a huge impact in my life. Whenever I felt sad or hopeless, I would think of Googol and convince myself that I should continue for Googol. His own struggles in life and recovery from it taught me that no matter what happens, it will be over one day and better time will come.
Whenever I was out of station, I would ask my parents what he was doing. My mother would sometimes send me photos of him sleeping in bed and not leaving any space for her.
His tiny tiny cute moments always left me with a smile. He had such an aura of positivity.
Disappearance
During the reign of the second bully cat, Googol one day disappeared. Usually he left the home daily, slept somewhere and then returned home. Sometimes, if he ate a lot (like coconut rice), then he would skip home for a day and return the next day.
But this time, he did not return. Days became weeks and weeks became months. I and my parents independently came to the conclusion that he is no more. Though we did not tell each other over fear of sad news. He was something around 8 years old that time. That was when I started preparing myself to accept that he is gone forever. I told myself that if he does not return in a few months, I would consider that he left the world.
But he aced against the odds and returned one day! However, the joy of his return lasted only few hours. He was not in good health and vomited his dinner. To make things worse, it was the raining season, so he never left home. And so he littered all around the house. My mother was also not well that time, so things were not in his favor. He was not sick as in visible sickness. He walked briskly, ate at the right time etc. But something was not right with his stomach.
We asked veterinaries and got few medicines. The weather also improved a little. Finally he came back to his normal life. But then the bully cat problems resumed. He found that Googol is home and resumed his attacks. Googol encountered a lot of difficulties during this period. He somehow hurt his leg and was limping for a week. Then he got cold and was always tired.
Thankfully, one day, the demise of bully cat happened and Googol lived the best of his life. My father told me that it is a demonstration of karma.
Last few months
The disappearance and return of Googol left me with two thoughts. First, Googol is getting older and his time will come one day. Second, it might be painful, so I have to be prepared to accept it.
With no more bully cats, Googol lived cheerfully. He continued his own peaceful life and did not cause any problems for us.
Around May 2026, he woke up one evening and meowed in a low tone. He seemed to be in pain. But with the meows, he left home. We were confused. But then, we have seen much bigger hurdles and how he over came them. So we thought that may be it is some temporary sickness. He indeed came back an hour later and slept peacefully.
Then next week, same issue occurred. But this time, he did not leave, he simply lied in our backyard. He looked so tired and was not able to even stand. We all were again confused and worried. I told myself that may be his time has come. My parents also told me that I should be brave and accept the fate.
Thankfully, after few hours of sleeping, he woke up and drank his bowl of milk and slept again. Next day, he was back to his charm and continued as if nothing happened. We were left in confusion. As in, whether, these events are rare coincidence or is something happening to him. Anyway, he appeared healthy, so we did not worry ourselves. My parents had asked a veterinarian and he had told them that Googol is getting older and so we should be prepared. My parents did not tell me this and my father was really annoyed at the negative remarks. But I myself had arrived at this conclusion anyway.
Googol’s regular activity slowly started changing. He did not eat fishes like he used to. He rarely left home, except for nature’s call. And even then, he would return back quick. He was always sleeping. He did not meow like before. He also reduced his food quantity.
There even used to be a few days where he stopped eating or drinking. He would try to eat and then quickly move his head away from bowl. We thought that may be he has a wound in his mouth.
Then he somehow recovered from that wound and began eating. But not like earlier. He sticked to his meow-less, always sleeping and home-ridden life. Sometimes, he would stay in our backyard and not come inside home. He preferred being alone.
Before sleeping, I would spend some time with him, petting him and keeping the bowls near him. I always used to think that may be tomorrow, it will happen. I would share a few words with him, thanking him for being there with me.
On 2nd August, he drank his bowl of milk and slept. Did not even eat the chicken pieces we gave him. He then slept outside our home. By evening, I could not find him in our home or backyard. I first thought he recovered and left home after weeks of home arrest. However the happiness did not last long as I quickly found him sleeping among the bushes. He would rarely go there, except to litter, given how congested the area was, but somehow he was sleeping.
He did not answer to my calls. I checked him then and there with a help of a torchlight and found him with a different sleeping position each turn. I consoled myself thinking that he will overcome this anyway and next day he would be back. At night, before sleeping, I tried reaching him with the help of a stick (it is not possible to reach his position that easily by hand, especially at night). He moved his tail a little.
I told my parents and they also looked at him. We all had hope. So I decided to clear my mind of his thoughts and slept. I had a few dreams where he was back to normal etc.
Next day, August 3rd, around 8 AM, my mother woke me up.
Sunset
During the last few months, I always told my mother (as she is the one who wakes up first) to check on him after she wakes up. Even when Googol was in his best, I would ask her where is Googol and she would answer me like “yea, Googol is the only thing you care. That baby drank a bowl of milk and is sitting in front of our home.”
So anyways, I got out of bed thinking that it is the day. On reaching her, she told me to come and check. I went over to the bushes and found him lying, motionless. I called his name with a heavy throat. He did not answer. Then, I tried to reach him using the compound wall as balance and somehow lifted him. His body was frozen and still. He passed away.
We placed his body in a cloth. My mother silently sat near him watching and asked me to wake my father. I went to my father and told him the news. He sobbed and told me to be brave and accept that it is the way of nature. I told him that it is alright and that it is all beyond our control anyway.
I tried to focus more on what to do next and so did not cry. I had a heavy throat and my eyes were full of tears. But I tried to control myself and keep my mind clear.
My parents told me that he has been like another son to them and a brother to me. So he deserves proper burial. As religious people, they suggested to do it as per customs of Hinduism. I did not protest or comment on it and simply followed what they told me to do. My father brought a packet of milk. My mother suggested that we fill his bowls with milk and water and bury it with him. We dig a hole in our backyard, buried him with his bowls and lit a camphor.
I still tried to keep my mind clear of his death and focus on what’s next. I came to my room, picked up my phone and prepared a message. Then I shared it with close friends who knew Googol. I then deleted my profile pictures in WhatsApp, Telegram, Matrix and Mastodon. Everyone shared their condolences and told me how Googol was my identity in social media.
My mother informed my sisters over phone and they talked to me in WhatsApp and asked me not to worry. They put a status with his picture.
Glimpses of past
Googol has been in our home for about ten years. Every morning he would meow at my mother for milk while she is preparing tea. Next, he would be with my father asking for fishes (we live near a fish market). Then, he would go past my room to exit the home. That time, he would pause and stare at me. Then I would ask him what he want and go to kitchen. Sometimes, his bowl would be empty. So I would pour water in it and give it to him. He would drink it slowly and then leave the house.
By evening, he would return and eat eggs or curd rice and do an afternoon nap. Then when my mother is preparing the evening tea, he would again drink another bowl of milk and leave. Sometimes he would return for dinner and eat another round of curd rice.
He followed this template and since it involved me, my father and mother, the sudden disappearance of him has left the home empty.
Whenever I would go to kitchen, I would find his bowls. Sometimes they would be empty. I would then ask my mother to fill it so he can eat when he is back. She would either ask me to do it or tell me that he just had his food. Since we buried the bowls with him, that spot now looks different.
As of writing the article, I have not set a new profile picture. I do not feel like yet.
There is a saying in Tamil that is like, the wishes of old people is to pass away peacefully without being a burden for their children (or caretakers). I was worried a lot for Googol that when his time comes, it would be worse. Like, anything could have happened. He could have hurt himself and constantly be in some pain. I would not be able to watch him suffer like that.
To make things worse, my sister was also in our home that week with her one year old baby. If Googol got any wounds, then everyone would prioritize the safety of the baby and so try to keep Googol outside home. Thankfully none of this happened. In fact, my sister’s baby was always surprised by Googol and would crawl towards him whenever he was there. Googol also seemed to have understood the baby’s nature and did not bother whenever she tried to catch his tail (though my sister intervened before the baby could touch him, for the safety of Googol as well as her baby).
So in that way, Googol lived his last few months in absolute peace without disturbing any of us.
As I said earlier, Googol was the power of positivity in my life. His style of careless sleep, big tummy and stay cool attitude always left a smile in my face. Without him, there is an odd vacuum in my life. My parents tried to console me that this is how nature is and I should not torment myself for it. Their worry is reasonable as a parent given how close I was to Googol. I have accepted the way of life and assured myself that I should be steady.
I do not know how to end this article. I did not want it to be a gloomy depressing content. Instead, I would like to remind myself of the charming lovely moments with Googol and thank him for all the happy vibes.
